I don’t feel good about this

Today I finished David Deutsch’s incredible book, The Beginning of Infinity, and went straight on to the next one I’ve got that I’ve been hanging to get stuck into, Bird by Bird by Anne Lamott. I’ve heard different people say it’s the book about how to be a good writer.

The problem is I shouldn’t have it. It’s a library rental, and it’s overdue. Damn. With 2 people ahead of me waiting for it. God damn it.

Each book you borrow from my local library you can have for 3 weeks, and then you can still renew it twice. That’s 6 more weeks. So if each person before me has Bird by Bird for their max allowed time of 9 weeks… times that by two……

So…. I won’t start reading Bird by Bird until sometime in motherfucking late April. Fuck that.

And I hate when I’m waiting for a library book, and then it’s overdue and the guy isn’t returning it. Stuff him – he’s got some hardcore bad library karma coming to him for that.

Before returning it though, I decided I’ll just have a little sneak peek, and then return it asap. Probably. Can’t hurt to have a look though. I think what I really wanted was a clear sign to hang on to it, or for someone to walk right up to me and say, ‘Yes David Martin, it is okay for you to keep this overdue book a few more days.’

Problem number 2 is that I’m already loving it. And it’s this paragraph from the introduction that got me hooked:

But I still encourage anyone who feels at all compelled to write to do so. I just try to warn people who hope to get published that publication is not all that it is cracked up to be. But writing is. Writing has so much to give, so much to teach, so many surprises. That thing you had to force yourself to do–the actual act of writing–turns out to be the best part. It’s like discovering that while you thought you needed the tea ceremony for the caffeine, what you really needed was the tea ceremony. The act of writing turns out to be its own reward.’

3 hours ago, I finished doing my third ever session of Float therapy. Afterwards, all mellow from the float, and chilling out in the upstairs lounge of this amazing place on the Sunshine Coast, I sat down to reread February 19th’s entry from Ryan Holiday’s The Daily Stoic. I fell one day behind a while ago and since I don’t like to read more than one entry a day, I hadn’t yet caught up. But, I thought it’s time to catch up and turned over to February 20th.

This is what it said…

‘It’s never great to judge other people, but it’s worth taking a second to investigate how a life dedicated to indulging every whim actually works out. The writer Anne Lamott jokes in Bird by Bird, “Ever wonder what God thinks of money? Just look at the people he gives it to.”

Holy shit. Bird by Bird!

If that’s not a sign to not return an overdue book I don’t know what is.

So….

Sorry, the two people waiting for this book, but I’m gonna hang on to it a wee bit longer. But I PROMISE I’ll slam out as many pages as possible over the next few days and then I swear you can have it.

And please let the library know, I’ll return my other books a week early or something to balance out the hardcore bad library karma.