This is better than all the good things on the internet put together and then multiplied by 8

Here are some palindromes¹:
• ‘Are Mac ‘n’ Oliver ever evil on camera?’
• ‘Dammit, I’m mad!’
and:
• ‘Desserts, sis? (sensuousness is stressed).’

Now, not only are those great, but on the same site as where those are from (palindromelist.net), today I also found something called ‘The Longest Palindrome’. I read the first line:

‘Star? Not I! Movie – it too has a star in or a cameo who wore mask – cast are livewires.’

‘What? That’s not a palindrome,’ I thought. So I read the next line:

‘Soda-pop straws are sold, as part-encased a hot tin, I saw it in mad dog I met. Is dog rosy? Tie-dye booths in rocks.’

‘What the? That’s not one either.’
‘Maybe both lines together? Nope.’
‘Maybe the third is? No again. The three lines together? Uh-uh. What the hell? I don’t get it.’

So I scrolled down and down and down and down and down and further down and aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaall the way down to the bottom of the page, and read the last line of the text:

‘Same row, oh woe! Macaroni, rats, as a hoot, tie. I vomit on rats.’

‘Wait a minute…. No way… hang, on… If this is for real…’

Scrolling back up, over FIVE THOUSAND WORDS UP, (or the equivalent of 12 A4 pages at normal body font size) you see the first line again (‘Star? Not I! Movie – it too has a star in or a cameo who wore mask.’)

HOLY FREAKING GODDAMN HELL – A 5,115 WORD PALINDROME.

YES!!!!!!!

It’s true. And I love that that actually exists and we live in a world that someone actually wrote that. Here’s the full version.

So how do you actually write palindromes?

Well, according to Oxford Dictionaries, do this: Start reading everything backwards, then zone out and just try to see the elements that make up words (without caring about the spacing), and lastly, try to make sense when you put words together, but don’t try to be serious.

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¹ From www.palindromelist.net