NEWS ALERT! Great White Shark That Murdered Man In Australia’s Whitsundays On Monday Hoping To Have Charge Reduced To Manslaughter In Queensland’s Supreme Court.

The shark which purposely killed a man in Queensland’s Whitsunday Islands earlier this week is desperately attempting to have his charge of first-degree murder thrown out of the supreme court and reduced to the lesser charge of manslaughter. The shark, which everyone can agree had it in for the man …

HEARTWARMING! Some person somewhere just died for some reason and when told the news, people were saddened and couldn’t say enough nice things about this now-dead person, even though they’d never even known this person’s name, gender, or even that this person actually existed in the first place. WOW, TOUCHING!

This story will tug right at your heart strings. Someone somewhere just died, and despite approximately 99.99999999999999999% of Earth’s population having no knowledge of the existence of this human, people all across the globe have instantly started sharing their insights and stories about what a wonderful, caring and loving person …