My Say: Yeah, I’m A Divorced Man And Yeah, I Know All Divorced Men Deserve To Immediately Be Tossed Into The Divorce Volcano Because They Are So Gross And Disgusting And Yuck, But Hang On, Whow There. Before You Kill Me By Hurling Me Into The Divorce Volcano, Hear Me Out, Because Although I Am Now Officially A Wretched Disgusting Garbage Human, I Still Have Some Other Stuff I Can Do And I’m Not Completely Useless to Society (By Dave Martin)

 MY SAY By Dave Martin       A month ago, my divorce was provisionally approved, making me a soon-to-be-divorced man and consequently meaning I deserved to be thrown into the Pit Of Disgusting Divorced Garbage Humans. And today, a month and a day later, it became official, meaning I am …

Russian Government Announces Annual Parade Through Moscow To Honour The Great And Unmatched Length Of Leo Tolstoy’s Books

MOSCOW, RUSSIA– The federal government of Russia has officially called an annual parade through the streets of Moscow to celebrate the wondrous word length of Leo Tolstoy’s books. Tolstoy, arguably the  writer whose publications contain the most words and pages ever, will be honoured throughout the streets of Moscow later this year on …

My Say: What Do You Mean ‘Why Is The Mona Lisa Famous?’ Because It’s Famous For Being Famous For Being Famous. Idiot. Fuck You. (By Marshall McWilliamson)

My Say  By Marshall McWilliamson       Geez you piss me off sometimes. What do you mean by ‘Why is the Mona Lisa so famous?’ Goddamn you’re an idiot with a punctured brain and a stupid body. It’s famous not only because it’s famous, but also because it’s famous …

I am Dan Reynolds of Imagine Dragons, Type Anything At Me!

Hey Why You Do It, I’m Dan Reynolds, I’m a musician and okay, shit, here we go.. Type Anything at me ***This is a mediated chat. See the rules for more info*** —————  Steveotheradone: ioqhrwo124u09138921490120-4-124124oiho3iu939’poj41ior3knlnkr3knlr2        ActuallyDanReynolds: ?       ***  KaitlinWelsh7118: KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL …

My Say: Oh Man, I Just Knew Today Was Going To Be Shitty As Soon As I Went Downstairs To The Basement First Thing This Morning And Found My Dad Sitting Ominously On A Couch Next To A Bloody, Lifeless Mountain Gorilla He Had Presumably Just Murdered (by Edwin Murray)

My Say By Edwin Murray         God damn it. This morning I woke up at my usual time of 7:15am and as I do every morning, headed downstairs to grab my work clothes from the laundry and get ready to go to work. And I don’t mind …